Posts Tagged ‘table’


I’m at the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF), an institution in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS), participating in the Earned Release Program (ERP).  This past weekend was marked by arguments and in fighting amongst inmates over stupid things.  Most of it of course involved Scott Dietz, revolving around rec room issues.  I’ve just noticed the courtesy between inmates in the laundry procedure and the order for showers is breaking down.  People skipping each other to use laundry or the shower causes friction.  I got to talk to Charles and Victoria Martin, my adoptive parents this weekend.  They’re going to send the glasses I sent away at Dodge Correctional Institution (DCI) to the sponsor of this blog who is picking me up.  They also will have cable which means I’ll be able to have internet access which is critical for my job search and getting up to speed on the technology and software I’ve missed the last two years.  Speaking of which, Sunday, May 8th marked the 2 year date of my incarceration.  Sixteen of those months this blog has run.  Not an anniversary I look at fondly but assured I won’t forget it. But I’ve been talking like it’s a foregone conclusion that I’m going to graduate June 10th.  Not if I keep acting the way I did Monday.  Now the last graduating class has a high number of guys who are busying themselves by starting trouble, including former swamper and cellie Malik Pearl joined by one of his cellies.  They took aim at me because on occasion I don’t wear a hat (not a hairnet mind you but a paper hat) when serving food as a swamper.  There is not rule that I’m aware of that says I have to and I’ve told you previously, I shave my head, so there’s really not a need.  But they started yelling at me to wear a hat.  I was visibly angered.  I put it on and asked them if they were happy now.  Afterwards, it was time to start our ERP group.  Our ERP social worker Ms. Grey took us through the entire Living With Others workbook that day.  In the middle of the morning we observed through the window to the dayroom that the guards on 1st shift had been joined by several others.  They began to shakedown every single cell even taking the extra clothing the inmates had acquired which usually is ignored.   Group got interrupted several times as we observed them taking things out of the cells critical to our graduation project.  At the end of the morning session, I went out to clean tables and put out napkins to get ready for lunch service.  I came right back and didn’t touch anything else an inmate egged on by Pearl’s cellie, demanded I change my gloves.  I refused.  This was just harassment.  We exchanged words across the dayroom.  My reaction was so out of character for me.  Lunch got served.  We had Swiss Rolls, which are a pretty hot item around here.  I observed that same inmate shoving some down his shirt to smuggle them to his cell.  I asked him if he wanted me to play this game he had started.  He quickly got back to his cell.  I wasn’t going to tell but I was mad!  Afterwards, I was told Pearl and his cellie were going to try to get me fired as a swamper.  Initially, I didn’t care. I don’t need the extra food and who needs this aggravation?  But after I calmed down, I remembered why I took this job to begin with.  I went to the inmate who took issue with the gloves and apologized for my reaction.  But more importantly, what is going on with me?  Is it just a simple chase of the “shirts”, where inmates near release get irritable and melancholy?  Whatever it is, I resolved to get a hole of myself and stay in today instead of thinking about my release in June.  We turned in our goals and objectives for Phase 3 in the afternoon session.  She approved them on the spot and told us to have our presentations ready for the following Monday (May 16th).  Mine are ironically, to improve my social skills here and being more patient.  Clearly, these goals are appropriate and necessary. 


I’m at the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF), an institution in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS), participating in the Earned Release Program (ERP). In the course of doing laundry and trying to get a break from cellie Andre Charles, I spent some time in the dayroom talking to a few guys on my unit.  First, I got to talk to a guy who is in a similar position to me in that he doesn’t have anywhere to go when he gets out after being paroled to Waukesha County.  He’s written to everyone you can think of inquiring about his situation, neatly organizing the info in a picture album you can order off canteen.  But he’s reached the same impasse as I have.  There appears to be nowhere to go except the shelter in Waukesha, WI, the Salvation Army.  His stepfather won’t allow him at their home.  But he’s come up with another plan.  He’ll get a cheap car and sleep in that since the weather will be warm when he’s released in May.  I argued it isn’t safe and the parole officer (PO) likely wouldn’t approve such a thing.  His argument back was that the PO could provide different accommodations if they didn’t like it.  I suspect the PO won’t take to such tactics.  But the desperation we both feel is pretty evident.  I even found myself thinking about this possibly that really isn’t.  Later I caught up with a guy from my ERP group, Mark Hogan.  He’s really become the class clown of our group, coming up with things to say that are really off the wall.  But he sat down with me at the table.  He’s almost 70, but is as strong as an ox, out lifting  many in the exercise room.  He has a gray Rollie Fingers type moustache and likes his gin.  He claimed to have done 4 years for his 5th offense DUI which is quite harsh so I’m a little doubtful.  Perhaps I telegraph that I’m receptive to such things, but he opened about his own experience with Post Traumatic Delayed Stress Disorder, and his time in Vietnam.  I shared part of my biological father’s experience in return.  I’m’ due to read my autobiography to the ERP group on February 11th (over 2 weeks away) so they all will know this stuff soon.  I’m a little nervous as many indicate they were very general with some indicating they flat out lied.  I’m just really nervous some will use it against me in some fashion outside the ERP group.  It’s not suppose to happen but the reality is it probably will.  Today was the first day our ERP group began reading it’s autobiographies.  But first a newcomer joined our group, an attractive Asian American woman named Nikita Cho who was a student interning under Ms. Grey, our ERP Coordinator.  After the breathing exercises and the introductions we had the first autobiography read, Larry Sands.  Sands had made it clear he wasn’t going to write a lot or be specific back in the beginning and it was pretty obvious.  So much so Ms. Grey made him sit down and write it over and called on the next guy, John Lloyd.   Lloyd had done a good job having lived a pretty normal life.  Grief over his father’s death led Ms. Grey to assign him the book Life is Goodbye Life is Hello by Alla Bozarth.  John and I sit across from each other at mealtime and during program time and we get along well.  In the afternoon session, we went over the stages of change – 1. pre-awareness, 2. Contemplation, 3. Preparation, 4. Taking Action, 5. Avoiding relapse and maintenance.  It was probably Ms. Grey’s best day that I’ve seen so far.  I’m happy to say I’ve been in 3, 4 and 5 since last January.


I’m at the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF), an institution in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS), participating in the Earned Release Program (ERP). Yesterday started out like every other breakfast.  Often we get a box of raisins with that meal.  The guy across from me at the table poured his raisins over his Frosted Flakes and on the raisins were tiny white worm like looking things.  He picked one up and put it on the table and sure enough it started squirming.  They were maggots!  I wanted to throw up.  I hadn’t opened my raisins yet and I highly doubt I’ll eat anymore while I’m here.  I’m not sure if it is on MSDF or the people that packaged them that this happened but it just doesn’t really matter.  After the moldy suncup (which I still won’t drink), warm milk and now this, I just don’t have a lot of confidence in the food here.  My cellie Andre Charles came by the table and quickly spread the word to others and soon it was the talk of the cellblock.  The rest of this particular Sunday was dominated by the soon to be crowned National Football Conference (NFC) Champions Green Bay Packers pre-game shows and football game.  Did I mention the Packers are going to the Super Bowl? Smile  Of course, Andre is a Pittsburgh Steeler fan so Super Bowl week should be interesting.  I did do one useful thing.  I made the decision to contact my biological half brother and let him know my natural father’s relatives were looking for him too.  I figured we may as well get this all over with.  The next day, began week 7 of our involvement in the ERP program.  We also are having our first phone contact with our Parole Officer (PO).  Mine is tomorrow and my PO’s name is Janet Martin (No relation to me).  She also had written my pre-sentence investigation that hadn’t been kind to me.  But more about that after the call.  As a result of the calls, we spent the entire morning in our cell.  After lunch we got into our information given to us on denial and defense mechanisms.  We each took turns reading one of the 12 mechanisms.  We got done and were promptly told to lock in.  I found out over supper what happened.  On the other side of our unit is a group who are there because they violated the terms of their parole and have what’s called an ATR or an alternative to revocation.  Once they graduate they get out instead of going back to prison.  But tonight three of those guys were transferred back to general population to await revocation.  I don’t know why.  One is facing 7 years.  All were 3 weeks away from graduation.  Spouse’s, families, and friends all were awaiting them to get out.  Plans made and hopes are sky high.  I can’t even imagine what’s going through their heads.  I  pray that I never find out.