I’m at the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF), an institution in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS), participating in the Earned Release Program (ERP). Nothing much happened the weekend after our ERP Group graduated. Two minor incidents would have implications later on. First, cellie Scar Johnson began talking trash about me in the dayroom. I got word of this from cellie Larry Sands. I just didn’t care as I’ve come to know the person he is and since I’m almost out of here opinions here matter even less than it did to me before. Second, cellie Jose Michaels had the occasion to be playing his music louder than normal. He likes a Puerto Rican style of rap which I don’t care for. But the way it has worked in our cell up to this point is we use our headphones for electronics. It’s a respect thing as not everyone likes what another might. So, I asked him to turn it down which he did. End of story right? Not exactly. Come Monday, it started similar to when I first got to MSDF. Lots of TV, took a shower and read. It’s so nice to not have to wait in line for the shower now! But during the day, our ERP social worker Ms. Grey came by and summoned us to the dayroom. I hoped against hope she got word our judges had already signed our paperwork, but no such luck. Though she hadn’t felt the need to go through our Phase III evaluations, she brought our Phase 3 evaluations for our signature. Glancing through mine, the ratings were generally positive, but the true reflection of how she felt laid in the comments she made. She mentioned how I went to the hole because of this blog but also mentions that though I never received any kind of discipline for it I seem to always have to have the last word and that I didn’t seem to grasp the basic tenants of the ERP program. I read this and briefly agreed. I was helping at her request other inmates with their goals for crying out loud! But I wasn’t going to make any headway here, certainly not with all those other group members standing around. It felt vindictive, almost retaliatory on her part. Of course, this doesn’t change anything about my status as having completed the ERP program. The only downside is this eval will go to my parole officer (PO), Helen Gaither. There’s a good chance she won’t even read it. But at the time I admit to being angry. I was even more angry when Sands returned and told me Ms. Grey asked him if he regretted moving to this cell. When he said no, she asked if he was sure. Again he said no. I sat there fuming. I went about my business thinking about all this. I got in a better mood though when Michaels came around. He has such a positive attitude, you can’t help but not be down around him. We got to talking and he told me that he had been unhappy when I asked him to turn down the music and that he can’t wait till Sands and I leave so he can run the show in this cell and they can be bad as they want in there. He was decent about it and he demonstrated respect by seeing we had a way of doing things before he got here. But I’ll still be glad I won’t be here for that collision between Scar and Michaels! But I’ll close with some comments about what Ms. Grey did. Its good I always wait before I write these entries. It allows perspective to form. But to be honest, I’ve been unhappy with my writing for this blog while at MSDF. I have had one hour a day to write whereas at other institutions I had tons of time. I’m also unhappy with my time at MSDF. I grew as a person much more while at DCI, JCI, and FMCI. Though MSDF and ERP were largely negative influences in my life, ultimately I’m responsible for my own growth or lack thereof. So I have to accept responsibility for that. It’s not Ms. Grey, MSDF, cellies or others fault. But I will say I do look forward to a more positive atmosphere that I will create out in the world. The proof is in the pudding as they say. I believe that with God’s help, I will be successful even if it does look overwhelming now.
Posts Tagged ‘Group’
My ERP Group Graduates
Posted: January 5, 2012 in UncategorizedTags: About, Afterwards, alcohol, arrival, bracelet, Bunker, Carr, cellie, cells, certificate, certificates, Charles, completion, conviction, criminals, dayroom, decision, Derek, Detention, didn, education, errors, Gaither, gist, Graduates, Grey, Group, guns, Hellen, ignorance, inmates, Institution, John, Johnson, judgment, June, Lest, Lloyd, Malcolm, manager, Martin, member, Milwaukee, MSDF, news, Nikita, officer, parents, person, Phase, piece, prayer, Presley, Prison, product, Program, Release, relief, room, Scott, Secure, setup, statement, System, Transformer, Unit, Victoria, Wisconsin, worker
I’m at the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF), an institution in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS), participating in the Earned Release Program (ERP). It was Friday, June 10th, graduation day for my ERP group. At about 8:30 am we all went down into the dayroom to setup the chairs for everyone to sit along with 9 or 10 chairs on the left side for whatever people that were not inmates that would attend. They put the Transformer image up on the board used at the last ERP graduation. They’ve been working on this as part of our graduation project. Then of course we put 10 chairs up front for us. John Lloyd, of course, served as the MC. He read an opening statement but the problem was the same as it was for every person who spoke thereafter. We really couldn’t be heard beyond the first couple of seats but we didn’t know that at the time. The unit manager then gave a statement congratulating us. We then each read a quote each of us chose along with saying what it meant to us. My quote was “If you think education is expensive, try ignorance” by Derek Bok. The gist of what I had to say about revolved around was that getting to know me, about why I think the way I do, recognizing the errors in how I think and how my changes are a result of a decision to change, not the product of the prison staff or programs. I’m pretty sure, though I have a deeper voice that carries pretty well, I’m sure they didn’t hear me very well. Our ERP social worker, Ms. Grey, clearly was unhappy with my comments. Oh well. If you’ve been following this blog, especially prior to my arrival at MSDF you’ve known this to be true. Afterwards Ms. Grey spoke and handed out ERP completion certificates. These were actually pretty impressive. In order to get my license back I’ll need to do an alcohol assessment and this certificate will show I’ve completed a program. That was followed with a closing statement by ERP group member Scott Bunker. Lest I forget, intern Nikita also made some nice comments while Ms. Carr and Ms. Presley both declined to say anything. After it was over, they handed out cookies to everybody after which we put the chairs away. We went back to our cells to await lunch. News of the carry conceal law came over the news. Cellie Malcolm Johnson said this was great news for criminals like himself because they would just take the guns away from the white people carrying them. And with that he forcefully put his hand at my side to demonstrate. I wanted to say something but I decided to wait until we were alone. About that time Ms. Grey showed up and wanted our Phase I , Phase II, and Phase III tests we had done. It took me a minute but I found them. After lunch, when Malcolm was in the room alone with me. I told him in the future not to put his hands on me. He said alright but didn’t apologize which is fine. It wouldn’t have been sincere anyway. Fortunately 1 pm arrived and since I’m now a graduate I went to our former group room and played ping pong and took a shower. It’s starting to actually set it. It’s over! It’s not so much joy as it is relief. I said a thank you prayer to God. I called my adoptive parents Charles and Victoria Martin and Charles got the phone line in for my bracelet but didn’t have the internet in yet. I also called one of this blogs’ sponsors and they are still planning on getting me at the bus station once I’m released. The next step is for the judge to sign my amended judgment of conviction and send it back to Ms. Grey. Ms. Grey will let my parole officer (PO) Hellen Gaither know who will send a C15 form telling MSDF to release me. This process should take 10 to 14 days. Piece of cake considering what we’ve been through. Don’t you think?
Get Our Beer Goggles On
Posted: October 28, 2011 in UncategorizedTags: alcohol, Anyway, ball, Beer, cooperation, coordination, counselor, dayroom, Dean, Detention, Dietz, drug, Easter, Epps, evaluations, fact, felon, furlough, gang, goal, Goggles, Grey, Group, Hogan, Information, Institution, interaction, intoxication, Johnson, leader, lesson, life, Mark, member, Milwaukee, movie, MSDF, muscle, Nikita, obstacle, officer, Omar, paper, Phase, Prison, Program, reaction, realization, Release, Resources, ruler, Russ, Scott, Secure, self, session, setup, Stark, System, Though, Time, Wisconsin, youth
I’m at the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF), an institution in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS), participating in the Earned Release Program (ERP). One part of the ERP program is we are required to do a detailed report on our drug of choice. I’m told other ERP programs in WPS had access to a lot of resources to do these reports that we don’t have here at MSDF. That combined with the fact that this is an OWI group which meant that everyone’s drug of choice was alcohol meant that all of the reports sounded the same and contained identical statistical information. So yeah it was a little boring but we had to go through the motions. Even our ERP group leader Ms. Grey has acknowledged that the lack of resources limits the ability for her to provide a productive group experience. Anyway, after these reports were read we proceeded to our self evaluations for Phase II, like we had done for Phase I. Group members Dean Stark and Russ Johnson had learned their lesson to not rate themselves too highly with Johnson probably going overboard the other way. I had rated myself a 4 on a scale of 1 to 15 on being social with peers and the group said I should mark it down to a 3. They were right of course. On interaction with staff I rated myself a 4 but ERP group member Scott Dietz said sarcastically I’d had a lot of staff interaction lately referring to my trip to the hole. The rating stood. Dietz has been making a lot of snide remarks since my return from the hole. It might be because of this blog but as Johnson put it to me when he said not to take it personally as this is just the way he is. That is true. In the afternoon session we started out with wearing “beer goggles” which are supposed to simulate different levels of intoxication. We went out into the dayroom where we pulled the tables and chairs aside and put tape on the floor and attempted to do the heel to toe walk police do for a DUI test. And who should be running all of this but intern Nikita! She has been very quiet and reserved for the most part. But she conducted herself quite well for the most part. While the exercise was funny, it reminded me of the failed tests I’d had my previous arrest. ERP group member Mark Hogan pretended to accidentally run into Nikita but she didn’t let it phase her. The group was testing her which was pretty clear. After Ms. Grey, who had taken a couple group members on parole officer (PO) calls, we did more tests. We setup the chairs as an obstacle course, tried to balance a ruler on a fingertip, and threw a ball back and forth between us. All of them demonstrated our lack of coordination and muscle/eye cooperation. Though the goggles really weren’t realistic it made the point at least for me. We had time left over so then we watched what Ms. Grey said was the last movie we had to watch called First Time Felon. This movie was about a younger man (Omar Epps) involved in gang life who gets a second chance by going through boot camp, the struggles he has after getting out and his eventual realization of his goal to be an inner city youth counselor. It was a good movie. We were given a reaction paper to write due for Monday. This weekend is Easter so Monday is a furlough day but none of us knew that until later. But the bottom line is another week is done, which is 19 of 26. I thank God for getting me through another one.