I’m at the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF), an institution in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS), participating in the Earned Release Program (ERP). It’s 6:46 pm on Tuesday, June 21st. Tomorrow, probably in the morning, I will be freed. I gave away some of my canteen to others and am trying to find boxes to pack my stuff since they took mine when I went to the hole and never returned them. Guard Art Cole has returned after an extended absence to deal with “personal demons”. He’s reinstated the shower list which has displease many. I find myself watching the dayroom with a mixture of happiness and fear. Happiness in the sense that I no longer will be dealing with this environment and fear in the sense that I know I have many struggles and battles ahead of me. But ready or not here I go. Today wasn’t a good day for 3 guys in my ERP group. John Lloyd has learned the judge won’t look at his release paperwork for 3 weeks. I can’t imagine what he must be going through. He has spent the day talking on the phone to those he loves in angry, frustrated tones. Larry Sands and Scott Bunker’s situation remains unchanged from yesterday. They are handling it much better than I would have I think. Augie Prescott left as expected today. I missed him leaving but I’m told he was smiling. The others beside these listed found out they will be leaving Tuesday. Of course, nobody found out anything until our ERP social worker Ms. Grey showed up about 3 pm. She dismissed Lloyd’s concerns, telling him brusquely the judge had 30 business days to answer. She just doesn’t belong in this line of work. Don’t do that in front of people when a man is desperate for anything at that point. I tried to cheer him up to no avail. She also didn’t do anything for Sands or Bunker either. But I’m not going to be here to see how this turns out. I’m watching the weather. If you’ve been following this blog from the first day in prison to my hospital trips it seems like I always have bad weather for traveling days. Today is thunderstorms, yesterday had flooding and tomorrow has its challenges. But I’m not worried. There is no weather that will keep me here! But I’ll be ok. After all of this, I will be unstoppable! Just like the song said, I’ve made mistakes and not always done my best. But with God’s help, I’m going to make it!
Posts Tagged ‘Augie’
Unstoppable
Posted: January 14, 2012 in UncategorizedTags: absence, Augie, avail, Bunker, Cole, dayroom, demons, Detention, environment, Grey, Guard, Hospital, Institution, John, June, Just, Larry, Lloyd, Milwaukee, mixture, MSDF, paperwork, Prescott, Prison, Program, Release, Sands, Scott, Secure, situation, song, System, thunderstorms, Unstoppable, Wisconsin, worker
Release Complications
Posted: January 13, 2012 in UncategorizedTags: acclamation, assistance, attitude, Augie, Bunker, cell, cellie, clerks, complications, dayroom, desk, Detention, Dietz, Everclear, faith, Gaither, girlfriend, Grey, Helen, Information, Institution, John, June, Larry, Lloyd, member, memory, Milwaukee, MSDF, news, officer, paperwork, perception, Prescott, Prison, Program, Release, room, Sands, Scott, Secure, Socrates, System, Tues, Waukesha, Wisconsin, worker, workers
I’m at the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF), an institution in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS), participating in the Earned Release Program (ERP). Monday started off just weird. Our ERP social worker Ms. Grey had us all assemble in our former group room which doubles as the rec room. There she informed us we need to be patient while awaiting our release paperwork to be processed and to stop having people on the outside contact the clerks for the judges involved. The problem is none of us have any faith in her or the process involved. It doesn’t help that the perception of Ms. Grey’s attitude has been one that seems to enjoy seeing the people in our group twist in the wind as they wait and not forthcoming with information. As for me, I was fortunate enough not to be involved with Milwaukee County and that my parole officer (PO) had already faxed my C15 form authorizing my release for Wednesday. I thought I was done with Ms. Grey, not quite. I was called to come see her in the dayroom from my cell. She wanted to know how I was getting transported from the bus station and if the PO had approved my plans. Of course, this had been done months ago. Then I was called down again because she had lost the Socrates assessment I had done way back at the beginning of this ERP group. She gave me a new one to fill out. At 1 pm she returned to collect it. I had thought about it and decided to ask if there was some sort of problem with my release plan. She said no. She then asked me if I was the group member that drank Everclear. I replied no I wasn’t. I was the guy who liked to drink alone at night. She nodded and went away. I’m sure she’s trying to write my case summary for my PO, Helen Gaither and her memory has failed her again. I thought social workers would keep notes on such things. But my problems are nothing compared to what 3 of my fellow ERP group members are dealing with. Cellie Larry Sands has somehow had his release paperwork get lost between when records sent it the Thursday before our graduation from ERP. Scott Bunker has had his release paperwork get put on the wrong desk because his judge had retired. John Lloyd has had his judge involved in a murder trial so nothing was getting done. Interestingly enough Lloyd and Bunker are Waukesha County cases. But neither Bunker or Sands find out what is happening without the assistance of the sister of ERP group member Scott Dietz who is kind enough to follow up on their cases with phone calls and inquiries. Lloyd had his girlfriend following up for him or he wouldn’t have found out. They were fortunate to not have heeded Ms. Grey’s acclamation this morning. The rest of the guys have no had their release paperwork signed. Now they are just waiting their PO to release them. One, Augie Prescott is getting released tomorrow (Tues, June 21st), his PO having been quick with the turn around. Bunker did get some good news. That ear plug that had gotten stuck worked itself out after fluid build up and pushed it out enough to where he could get it. He still can’t hear as he feels like he’s underwater but hopefully he’ll be ok now. I just watched TV that night. I had figured today to be my release date almost since I got here. But I’m not complaining, I’m grateful. I could be going through what Sands, Bunker, or Lloyd are going through. It really is almost over.
Victim Impact Letter Review
Posted: November 29, 2011 in UncategorizedTags: Alabama, Augie, Bunker, catheter, ceremony, computer, Detention, didn, disc, goal, goals, Grey, handout, haven, Impact, Information, Institution, JoAnn, letter, member, Microsoft, Milwaukee, MSDF, news, officer, Phase, Prescott, presentation, Prison, Program, Release, Review, room, Scott, Secure, session, Some, System, Though, Transformer, Truth, Undo, victim, wasn, wife, Wisconsin, word, worker, wouldn
I’m at the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF), an institution in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS), participating in the Earned Release Program (ERP). We were supposed to start our ERP group morning session with the remaining Phase 3 goal and objectives presentation but group member Augie Prescott was absent due to a medical issue so our ERP social worker Ms. Grey, decided to review each victim impact letter with us prior to their presentation to the group on Thursday. Speaking of Augie, we found out his interstate compact which would allow him to move to Alabama upon release, was approved. Some more good news was that Scott Bunker has had his catheter removed and has been cleared of serious medical issues. So this was all good to hear. I was the first one to have my victim impact letter reviewed with Ms. Grey. It was from my ex-wife JoAnn. She described hating being alone during our marriage, the disastrous effect on my stepdaughters, being left with the mortgage, accused me of being unfaithful (which isn’t true) while admitting she had not been a saint either. Though it was biased, there was a lot of truth in what she said. I’m not nervous about reading it to the group though. There was nothing there I haven’t talked about or have been dishonest about with my ERP group. After I was done, I went up to the computer room to work on our graduation project handout for the ceremony. It wasn’t long before I was joined by just about everybody in the group all giving their input on what it should look like while standing behind me. Every time I did something that didn’t work out they were of course quick to point that out. I patiently explained about the Undo function in Microsoft Word. Ms. Grey sent word when she saw everyone up in the computer room with me that I wasn’t allowed to talk about the letter from JoAnn. She needn’t have worried. I still don’t volunteer information about myself unnecessarily. But the good news on the graduation project handout is that the images Ms. Grey gave me this time – the bumblebee transformer – worked out well this time. Not only that, but since everyone was waiting they all had the chance to sign off on its design. So I put it on the disc and would give it to Ms. Grey at the afternoon session. Let’s hope it’s done. The afternoon session started off with Ms. Grey telling us she would not share how she evaluated us in Phase 2 and if we wanted to see it we would have to ask our parole officer (PO) after we got out. When we asked why, she just flat out said she didn’t want to. We were pretty mystified and annoyed. Wouldn’t she want us to know how we were evaluated? We want to see it if the PO does, though these guys who have been locked up before say the PO doesn’t care about such things. So that caused a bit of a stir after group. The rest of the day was spent listening to the goals and objectives of the rest of the group members. Tomorrow is Wednesday, a Training Day, which means there are no groups. She has the disc with our graduation project program on it. I don’t anticipate an eventful rest of the week. I’ll probably end up regretting I said that!
ERP Torture
Posted: November 28, 2011 in UncategorizedTags: Andre, Augie, ball, breakfast, Brian, cell, cellie, Charles, clue, complaints, computer, Corey, Detention, disc, doesn, feedback, goal, Grey, haven, Hogan, Impact, Institution, June, Just, Larry, Little, Mark, Milwaukee, Most, MSDF, objections, officer, Once, Phase, poster, Prescott, presentation, Prison, Program, Release, response, room, Sands, scrutiny, Secure, session, situation, System, topic, Torture, Transformer, vacation, victim, week, Whalen, Wisconsin, worker
I’m at the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF), an institution in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS), participating in the Earned Release Program (ERP). Cellie Brian Whalen just as recently released forcer cellie Corey Ball, was released shortly after breakfast, about 7:15 am. His parole officer (PO) came to get him. Just like Ball and Andre Charles, he swore he’d write but I doubt he will. It’s just Larry Sands and I in the cell for now. We both dread having to take on new cellies with this short amount of time left for us but with a new ERP group starting next week, it is inevitable. Most of the guys from the last ERP graduating class are still here because of various reasons such as judges haven’t signed off yet or problems with getting their place to live approved. I’m grateful my situation, though not ideal, is pretty much set. I started my ERP morning group session bringing with me the disc I had put all our graduation materials on to give to our ERP social worker Ms. Grey to be printed. I was happy to be done. The session started with Ms. Grey letting us know that she’d be on vacation the week beginning May 30th through June 4th and next week, the week of May 23rd, would be devoted to the final PO call for group members, though two members had their PO calls today. Augie Prescott had his call and no clue how things went. But Mark Hogan also had his call and his parole was supposed to have been transferred weeks ago from Milwaukee County but no go. They wanted to put him in a transitional living place (TLP) in Milwaukee if it doesn’t get worked out. His response? He wants to go back to PRC and have them send him to a minimum security facility once he graduates ERP. He doesn’t want the more intense scrutiny of Milwaukee County than he would get at the rural county he wants to go and where he owns land. So I get it. The topic turned to our graduation project. I gave her the disc. I thought that would be the end of it. We had a lot of spare time at the end of our morning session and Ms. Grey said it was extreme torture having to sit here with nothing to do which drew a big laugh from us with some commenting that she now knew how they felt. It thought that whole thing was interesting. In the afternoon session, she had returned with the disc I had given her and had complaints about how some of it was worded. I said that was fine, she allowed me to go to the computer room and change that. Once I came back, I gave the disc back to her but it was pretty clear they had been talking about the project and me while I was gone. Ms. Grey claimed it was her idea that she was unhappy with the amount we had borrowed from the previous ERP class design though her words were strikingly familiar to the terms used by Larry Sands in his objections. She took a vote and it was voted that they basically wanted to start over with a new transformer and colors, the bumblebee. I was extremely unhappy. After all it had been decided as a group previously, we had wanted as little work as possible to have to be done for this project. It did mean Ms. Grey would have to find a new picture of a transformer. And at least I’ll have a whole week to work on it. But I won’t lie. I am still unhappy. We did our Phase 3 goal presentation today. It took the tone of lets hurry up and get it done. Little to no feedback from anyone really. Tomorrow we are supposed to read our victim impact letters. We were supposed to have gone over those in private with her and determine if it was going to be read to the group. Now we’ll have 5 minutes to review it. I’m guessing the time crunch is coming into play here. We’re also supposed to review the ripple effect poster. So it’ll be an interesting day tomorrow. And I already can’t wait for it to be over with!
You Are Not Alone
Posted: November 11, 2011 in UncategorizedTags: Augie, blog, clue, communication, correspondence, counselor, degrees, Detention, difference, effort, guilt, Health, Heck, Information, inmate, inmates, Institution, Late, lessons, member, Milwaukee, MSDF, news, ones, perseverance, prayer, Prescott, Prison, Program, Release, Secure, solution, solutions, Some, System, Technology, Thank, tornadoes, Wisconsin
I’m at the Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF), an institution in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS), participating in the Earned Release Program (ERP). Late Friday we got some great news. The family and home of ERP group member Augie Prescott is safe after the devastating tornadoes down south. Of course, I’ll have no word from my recently reconnected biological family for some time as my only means of communication is by email through the blog sponsors. But I’m not thinking about that because it would be counterproductive to my mental health. Kind of like some of you worrying continually about your loved ones who are locked away will only serve to make you insane. You’ve got to go on, be able to function, which you can’t do it your always in your own prison of paralysis. Some of you out there are in so much pain over what has happened to the inmate you love and what is happening to your and your family as a result you’ll turn to the likes of me. Perhaps you know I’ll understand like no one on the outside will. Be honest, compassionate, and actually answer your correspondence unlike many men who are locked up who seem reluctant or unable to respond. For many of us inmates we are consumed by shame, guilt, fear, insecurity, and doubt so much so that we’re unable to even know where or how to begin an honest discourse with those that we love on the outside. Let me say that again. Those that we love! Be assured their hearts are still with you and though your inmate may not communicate well at times, its not because they don’t’ want to. They just don’t know how. That becomes evident in the inmates silence or communication that seems trivial, sexual, controlling, or angry. Please keep in mind when you write me, I’m not trained as a counselor (though I’ve though about it but don’t have the first clue how to achieve that). I was an Information Technology (IT) guy prior to prison. I don’t claim any special insight nor am I going to have a solution to all your problems. Heck, I’m not aware of the solution to all of my problems yet. What I do have to share with you has not been something I’ve done on my own but it is part of who I am today and it’s something you’ve seen played out on these blog entries over the last 723 days. And that is the battle for my soul and mind. It’s the same exact battle your loved ones in prison fight with varying degrees of effort and success, just like me. What I tell all of you is your inmate is so blessed you stand by him and have not forgotten him. Until the last 6 months, I largely had no one except for the blog sponsors and those through this blog I now call friends. But I feel blessed and am happy that I’ve made a difference for some of you and wish I could do better for many others. Thank you for reaching out to me and telling me your stories. When my answers aren’t adequate there is always prayer, which I do for many of you often. If I could end your pain I would but prison is not a place of magical solutions, but lessons learned through tears, honesty, and perseverance by inmate and their loved ones alike even though our loves ones didn’t deserve this. Be strong, ask for help and know that you are not alone!