The Hater

Posted: September 13, 2010 in Uncategorized

I’m at the Fox Lake Minimum Correctional Institution (FMCI), a facility in the Wisconsin Prison System (WPS).  This morning people in the barracks made a lot of noise for an unknown reason.  I looked at a neighbors digital clock and it said 4:30 am.  I got up and as usual, even though you keep your eyes straight as you can, you can’t help but notice the inmates who are already awake and taking care of themselves, while watching the aisle, I’m sure to see if anyone was coming that may see them.  No one mentions it if someone was seen, they just pretend they didn’t.  Which is just as well.  I mean can you imagine the contents and expressions of that little chat? 

They were already serving breakfast for those leaving for work early.  Today its sausage, Malt O Meal, orange juice and toast.  I sit in the dayroom.  A guy on my right is what I call a professional hater.  He ridicules everyone and everything.  To my left another guy, his buddy, agrees with everything he says and seems to really want the Haters approval.  I can’t stand guys like him, so I’m real careful about saying anything.  I want to tell him that you are in prison just like the rest of us, on what basis do you have the right to belittle and laugh at what others have to say?  The only thing the Hater and everyone agreed on was that the newscaster, Christine Bellport, had a “really nice rack”.  Then he started in on me for being quiet and polite.  After this went on for a few minutes I had enough.  I asked if he had been abused as a child and was now compensating for the lack of positive reinforcement he didn’t receive?  He made a snide remark about how thin I am and about shaving my head , implying I was a homosexual.  He’s very overweight and I could have laid into him in so many cruel ways but I bit my tongue.  Not because I’m noble mind you.  I just don’t want to escalate this thing.  It’s not worth it at all.  I told him he was just jealous of my figure.  Fortunately, the Hater went to work shortly thereafter.  I wondered if I hit a nerve with my question.  He didn’t get like that without help.

After turning my tray in, I went outside.  In a secure minimum setting we don’t have to ask to go outside.  It’s as close to any kind of alone time as I’m going to get even though there are already a few inmates out here.  It really is a beautiful landscape, if you can ignore the electric fence and barbed wire that sits on top of it that obstructs your view.  Its cornfields after the fence then trees.  I loved hiking in wooded areas and climbing trees before I got to prison.  Yes, even as an adult!  It used to give my ex-wife fits.  I just walked back and forth in the yard for awhile.  About twenty minutes later, a flock of seagulls nosily descended on the yard in front of me eating what they found in the fresh mown grass.  Did you know seagulls have boundaries too?  If one got too close to another, they chase the other away, especially the ones with orange in their beak.  But yet they still cooperate with each other in flying and landing.  They’ve got down what most of us struggle with in relationships.

As for me, no word on when I’ll depart to Milwaukee Secure Detention Facility (MSDF).  I’m on my last envelope, as they wouldn’t let me have my property because I’m here temporarily.  That means you won’t hear from me again until I get to MSDF.  I don’t like to write blog entries and leave them laying around.  A guard or snooping inmate might read it and have issues.  And we don’t want that now do we?  I appreciate your words of support (you know who you are) and I’m sure I’ll be back in no time.


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